Motherhood - Volunteering and Working.

I always wanted to be a mother. I remember being very young and asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, and my answer was always “A Mother”. Motherhood was a lot more work than I ever anticipated, and it still is. Once a mother, always a mother! The hardest part was that I just wanted everyone to be happy. I believe that when we are young, we don’t realize that you cannot make someone happy. That has to come from them! You can love and care for them, which brings them happiness, but how they look at every situation is how much happiness they will bring into their own lives. It took me many years to realize that. At times, I felt like I was failing my children. I could only do so much with them.

Having three children and a husband who worked a lot was a challenge. David would leave early in the morning and then only return late at night. He basically would only see them on the weekends. I tried to do all the indoor and outdoor chores, so he would have quality time with them at home. Once again, that put pressure on me, and eventually, it caught up with me. I also didn’t want them to suffer regarding being able to participate in activities. At times, I ran around like a chicken without a head. Having three children in different activities, with only one parent to drive and watch, can be a challenge. A lot of mothers in my situation would just not bother. I didn’t want to be that mother, so I pushed myself in every way. Not only did I make sure they did the activities they wanted, but if they needed volunteers, I would step right in to help. I hope my children will look back and appreciate everything I did for them.

From the years of 1995 to 2005, I really overdid it. The children were older, so I could leave them at their practices on their own. It would allow me to drive the other children to where they needed to be. I would spend a lot of my evenings managing different sports teams. Then, I also became very involved with the Soccer Association. It all started with just attending an executive meeting with my neighbour, and then she reeled me in. I started there as the registrar, and as the club tripled in size I also added administrator to my title. It had become a full-time job, with working many late nights, so they decided to give me a small salary. I enjoyed my time with the Association, but the job became too much. In 2005, I decided it was time to hand over my job to someone else. I had given ten years of my time and energy, and it was time for someone else to take over.

My daughter was now 22, the boys were 20 & 15. I was still very involved with activities that the youngest had at school, like rugby, wrestling, and band. I did a lot of driving the guys around when they would have games or competitions elsewhere. I enjoyed those drives because they let me know the team members. We had many laughs and smelly vans too!

I hadn’t worked outside the home since my first child was born in 1983. It was a bit scary, to say the least, but I knew I could do it. I had self-educated myself with different computer programs, had always been told I was good with people and was determined. I wanted to find a job where I could help people and enjoy going to work. After I trained the new person to take over my duties at the Soccer Association, I started to apply for some receptionist jobs. That, to me, was a very important position in any company. You are the first person they speak to, and you are the one who gives them a good impression of the company. I went to several interviews, but nothing appealed to me. I was offered several jobs, but I was looking for the right one. I was then offered a job by our pharmacist. He could see that I was friendly and wanted someone like me.  I had always been interested in medicine, so it seemed the right fit. The extra perk was that it was a ten-minute walk from home. After working there for a few months and getting the hang of things, I started having a lot of back pain. My job entailed a lot of standing, and I wasn’t sure if that was the problem. With encouragement from the pharmacist, I went to my doctor, who then sent me for a back X-ray. I had Degenerative Disk Disease (DDD), which is why I had so much pain.

Standing or sitting for long periods can cause pain. I tried to alternate, but it was nearly impossible, so I left this job. I was discouraged and had to look at what kind of job I could do.

I knew I would have to have a job where I could set my routine to alternating my sitting and standing. I would also need a very understanding boss!